“When I was at school, people used to throw gold bars at me. I was the victim of bullion”

Some people at school are victims of bullying. English comedian Tim Vine has used this joke in his act since at least 2008:
   
“When I was at school, people used to throw gold bars at me. I was the victim of bullion.”
 
         
Wikipedia: Bullying
Bullying is the use of force, threat, or coercion to abuse, intimidate, or aggressively dominate others. The behavior is often repeated and habitual. One essential prerequisite is the perception, by the bully or by others, of an imbalance of social or physical power, which distinguishes bullying from conflict. Behaviors used to assert such domination can include verbal harassment or threat, physical assault or coercion, and such acts may be directed repeatedly towards particular targets. Rationalizations of such behavior sometimes include differences of social class, race, religion, gender, sexual orientation, appearance, behavior, body language, personality, reputation, lineage, strength, size, or ability. If bullying is done by a group, it is called mobbing.
 
Wikipedia: Tim Vine
Timothy Mark “Tim” Vine (born 4 March 1967) is an English writer, actor, comedian and presenter, known for his quick-fire puns and his role on the BBC series Not Going Out until his departure in 2012. He has released a number of DVDs of his stand-up comedy and has written several joke books. In 2010 and 2014, Vine won the award for best joke at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. His winning jokes were: “I’ve just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I’ll tell you what, never again” and “I decided to sell my Hoover ... well it was just collecting dust.” He was the runner up in 2011, 2012 and 2013.
   
19 April 2008, Hull (UK) Daily Mail, “Punslinger shoots from the lip: If you’re ever walking along a beach and a tall, blonde, gangly man starts shouting random words at you, don’t worry, it’s probably just Tim Vine trying to learn his lines,” pg. 4:
As a flavour of Vine’s verbal gymnastics, puns from his 2006 Current Puns tour included such gems as: “So I told my girlfriend I had a job in a bowling alley. She said ‘Tenpin?’ I said, ‘No, it’s a permanent job’.”
 
And my own personal favourite: “When I was at school people used to throw gold bars at me. I was the victim of bullion”.
     
getSURREY (UK)
How gold-bar Tim was a victim of bullion
“I WAS in Tesco and saw this man and woman wrapped in a bar code. I said: ‘Are you two an item?’.”

By GetSurrey
00:00, 29 APR 2008 UPDATED 00:06, 3 JUL 2013
(...)
The 41-year-old is the younger brother of BBC presenter Jeremy Vine. The siblings grew up in Cheam and attended Epsom College as young men.
 
“I really enjoyed going to college,” Tim said. “But there was one kid who always used to throw gold bars at me. I was a victim of bullion.”
     
Democratic Underground
Ladies and Gentlemen, let me present Tim Vine
Kutjara
Sun Jun-15-08 10:42 PM
(...)
* When I was at school people used to throw gold bars at me. I was the victim of bullion.
 
Twitter
Alan Dobson‏
@dobbo101
When I was at school people used to throw gold bars at me. I was the victim of bullion #joke
1:37 AM - 13 Jan 2010
   
Twitter
Morgan‏
@MorganF1
When I was at school people used to throw gold bars at me. I was the victim of bullion
12:03 PM - 25 Jan 2010
   
Twitter
ROGER BAYNTON‏
@rbaynton
When I was at school, people used to throw gold bars at me.
I was the victim of bullion.
2:12 AM - 26 Feb 2010
   
Twitter
Johnny Bear‏
@JohnnyBearUK
When I was at school people used to throw gold bars at me. I was the victim of bullion. Tim Vine - Comedy gold.
3:00 PM - 7 Aug 2010
 
Twitter
🤣 The Dad Joke Man 😉‏
@DadJokeMan
When I was at school, other kids used to throw gold bars at me.
I was the victim of bullion…
2:30 PM - 1 Feb 2018