“Knives should be named chopsticks”

Are chopsticks properly named? “Why are they called chopsticks? They can’t chop fuck all. Knives should be called chopsticks and chopsticks should be called knives” was posted on Twitter on February 18, 2012. “Chopsticks should be called grabby poles and knives should be called chopsticks” was posted on Twitter on April 23, 2013.
     
“Knives should be named chopsticks” was posted on Reddit—Shower Thoughts on June 17, 2016.
   
         
Twitter
James Redmond‏
@Jayredmo
Why are they called chopsticks?
They can’t chop fuck all.
Knives should be called chopsticks and chopsticks should be called knives.
9:15 AM - 18 Feb 2012
 
Twitter
Benny Feldman‏
@Felddawg
Chopsticks should be called grabby poles and knives should be called chopsticks.
12:12 PM - 23 Apr 2013
 
Twitter
seagull‏
@KyleJimenez1
Knives should be called chopsticks.  Chopsticks should be called grabby poles.
4:02 PM - 12 Oct 2013
 
Twitter
Ed Galvez‏
@EdGalvez
I feel knives should be called “chopsticks”, chopsticks should be called “pinch sticks” and I should be called “Captain Smartypants”.
8:19 PM - 23 Jul 2014
   
Reddit—Shower Thoughts
Knives should be called chopsticks, since they’re literally sticks that chop.
submitted May 24, 2015 by P00000000000P_
 
Twitter
Alend Roberd‏
@AlendRoberd
Knives should be named chopsticks. Chopsticks should be named grabtweezies
1:13 PM - 22 Jul 2015
 
Reddit—Shower Thoughts
Knives should be named chopsticks.
submitted June 17, 2016 by [deleted]
 
Reddit—Shower Thoughts
Aren’t knives the real “chop sticks”?
submitted September 14, 2016 by [deleted]
 
Reddit—Shower Thoughts
Knives should be named chopsticks.
submitted October 21, 2017 by really_really_good