“If at first you don’t succeed, try management”

“If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again” is a popular American poem verse from the 1830s. The verse has many joke endings that replace “try, try again.” 
 
“If at first you don’t succeed, try management” is a jocular anti-proverb that has been cited in print since at least 1998 and is of unknown authorship. “If at first you don’t succeed, try management” has been printed on many gift items, such as T-shirts and posters.
 
American film comedian W. C. Fields (1880-1946) is attributed with this take on the saying: “If at first you don’t succeed, try try again. Then quit. There’s no use being a damn fool about it.” Other variations include “If at first you don’t succeed, call dad,” “If at first you don’t succeed, call it version 1.0,” “If at first you don’t succeed, drink whiskey. You’ll be amazed how little you care,” “If at first you don’t succeed, you’re running about average,” “If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried,” “If at first you don’t succeed, pay someone else to do it for you,” “If at first you don’t succeed, redefine success,” “If at first you don’t succeed, try left field,” “If at first you don’t succeed, try two more times so your failure is statistically significant,” “If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving isn’t for you,” “If at first you don’t succeed, we have a lot in common” and “Cooking Rule: If at first you don’t succeed, order pizza.” A different version is, “If at first you do succeed, try not to look astonished.”
 
       
The Yale Book of Quotations
Edited by Fred. R. Shapiro
New Haven, CT: Yale University Press
2006
Pg. 578:
Thomas H.Palmer
U.S. author, 1782-1861
“‘Tis a lesson you should heed,
Try, try again;
If at first you don’t succeed,
Try, try again.”

Quoted in The Village Reader (1840). The identical words, except with “try, try again,” appear in a poem titled “Perseverance; or, Try Again,” printed in Common School Assistant, Aug. 1838. No author is identified.
 
24 May 1998, San Antonio (TX) Express-News, “Random Notes” by Linda Vaughan, Insight:
“If a first you don’t succeed - try management.”
 
NetScrap
Things We’d Like To See On Company Motivational Posters…
Entered on: 09/24/1998
(...)
19) If at first you don’t succeed - try management.
 
28 September 1999, Charlotte (NC) Observer, “Cigar fad cools,” pg. 3E:
If at first you don’t succeed, try management.
 
Google Books
Yada, Yada, Yada.Com.Org.Edu.Gov.Email:
What I Learned on the WWW/Internet

By Joan E. Miller
Lincoln, NE: iUniverse, Inc.
2000
Pg. 13:
If at first you don’t succeed, try management.
 
The Laughter Remedy
They Who Laugh, Last!
Fall, 2002
Paul E. McGhee, PhD
Humor as a Management Tool
If at first you don’t succeed, try management.
 
25 July 2003, Daily Herald (Chicago, IL), “Daily dose of laughter is a wise prescription in troubling times” by Jack Mobley, sec. 1, pg. 15, col. 4:
These Inspirational Posters for the Cubicle come from the Internet.
 
If at first you don’t succeed, try management.
 
Google books
The Little Book of Office Morons
Cheam, Surrey: Crombie Jardine
2005
Pg. 58:
USELESS MANAGER
OFFICE MOTTO:
If at first you don’t succeed, try management.
 
Google Books
The Official Best of the Net Joke Book
By Tom Haran III
Minneapolis, MN: Mill City Press, Inc.
2011
Pg. 71:
If at first you don’t succeed—try management.