“I had a dream last night that I was cutting carrots with the Grim Reaper—dicing with death”
English writer and comedian Tim Vine has a frequently told one-line joke about dicing carrots:
“I had a dream last night that I was cutting carrots with the Grim Reaper—dicing with death.”
“If you chop carrots with the grim reaper are you dicing with death?” was posted on the newsgroup alt.airports.uk.edinburgh on July 2, 2008.
Wikipedia: Tim Vine
Timothy Mark “Tim” Vine (born 4 March 1967) is an English writer, actor, comedian and presenter, known for his quick-fire puns and his role on the BBC series Not Going Out until his departure in 2012. He has released a number of DVDs of his stand-up comedy and has written several joke books. In 2010 and 2014, Vine won the award for best joke at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. His winning jokes were: “I’ve just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I’ll tell you what, never again” and “I decided to sell my Hoover ... well it was just collecting dust.” He was the runner up in 2011, 2012 and 2013.
Google Groups: alt.airports.uk.edinburgh
Sean Connery International clear choice for take-off
Jon Simpson
7/2/08
(...)
JRS
‘If you chop carrots with the grim reaper are you dicing with death?’
29 November 2008, The Sun (London, UK), “Have a laugh with Sun Readers,” pg. 33:
I WAS chopping up carrots with the Grim Reaper the other day.
Yes, I was dicing with death!
GARY PEARSON
4 January 2009, News of the World, “Laugh in 2009 with our Mirth Marathon,” pg. 6:
Cutting carrots with the Grim Reaper? You’re dicing with death.
Twitter
Chrisensible 🗯️
@onion2k
I had a dream last night that I was cutting carrotts with the Grim Reaper… dicing with death!
9:47 AM - 13 Mar 2009
Twitter
Wendy Mallas
@Wendywitwoo
I was in the kitchen this morning cutting up carrots with the Grim Reaper. Yes I know I was Dicing with Death!
6:03 AM - 22 Apr 2009
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29 August 2009, Daily Mail (London, UK), “It’s the way we tell ‘em” by Claire Cohen, pg. 33:
I HAD a dream last night that I was cutting carrots with the Grim Reaper - dicing with death.
Google Books
The Biggest Ever Tim Vine Joke Book
By Tim Vine
London, UK: Century
2010
Pg. 194:
I had a dream last night I was chopping up carrots with the Grim Reaper — dicing with death.
Google Books
5,000 Great One Liners
Compiled by Grant Tucker
London, UK: Biteback Publishing Ltd
2012
Pg. ?:
I had a dream last night that I was cutting carrots with the Grim Reaper. Dicing with death.
iNews
50 of Tim Vine’s most ingenious jokes and one-liners
by Alex Nelson
Friday September 1st 2017
(...)
“I had a dream last night that I was cutting carrots with the Grim Reaper – dicing with death.”
Twitter
Dad Jokes
@Dadsaysjokes
“I had a dream last night that I was cutting carrots with the Grim Reaper – dicing with death.”
1:43 PM - 28 Dec 2017