"I drink coffee for your protection"

“I drink coffee for your protection” is a jocular one-line saying that has been printed on many gift items, such as coffee mugs and T-shirts. A person without coffee, the saying implies, is dangerous to others.

The saying was posted on the newsgroup rec.crafts.textiles.quilting on September 26, 1998. It’s not known who said it first.

Google Groups: rec.crafts.textiles.quilting
OMG…..Somebody STOP me!!
Wendy Scott
9/26/98
(...)
Wendy Scott
“I drink coffee for your protection”

Google Books
Espresso for Your Spirit:
Hope and Humor for Pooped-Out Parents
By Pam Vredevelt
Colorado Springs, CO: Multnomah Books
1999
Pg. 9:
“I drink coffee for your protection, you know.”

Google Groups: alt.castlenet
The Joys of Java
The BEAST
4/4/02
(...)
12.. I drink coffee for your protection

Google Groups: melody_yesterday
i drink coffee for your protection !
dirty2feet
8/10/05
http://www.fthwholesale.com/Mousepads/PageMPAD14/MPAD14-4%20I%20Drink%20Coffee%20for%20your%20protection2.jpg

Twitter
Busy Mom
‏@Busymom
I drink coffee for your protection.
9:38 AM - 21 Sep 2007

Twitter
rosebud3606
‏@rosebud3606
@GeekGirlsRule i have a shirt that says, “i drink coffee for your protection”
11:07 AM - 21 Jan 2009

Twitter
#Louisiana #GeauxLA
‏@jllanclos
Carol Barnier: says her coffee mug says “I drink coffee for your protection.”
9:44 PM - 24 Apr 2009

Google Books
Ten Beach Road
By Wendy Wax
New York, NY: Berkley Books
2011
Pg. ?:
A gift from Kyra Singer who knew her well and which read, “I drink coffee for your protection.”

Google Books
Outback Blaze
By Rachael Johns
North Sydney, NSW: Harlequin Enterpises AU
2014
Pg. ?:
They stopped and fawned over handmade jewellery, cutesy signs (“I drink coffee for your protection”; “I have a kitchen because it came with the house”), cacti in fancy painted pots and tiny baby clothes none of them had any use for. Yet.

Google Books
A Week at the Lake
By Wendy Wax
New York, NY: Jove Books
2015
Pg, 383:
I bought her a T-shirt for Christmas that reads, I DRINK COFFEE FOR YOUR PROTECTION, and I’m tempted to give it to her now.