“Diner: What’s wrong with these eggs I ordered? Waiter: Don’t ask me. I only laid the table.”
A restaurant joke is:
Diner: What’s wrong with these eggs I ordered?
Waiter: Don’t ask me. I only laid the table.
“Small Girl: ‘Where did the funny little eggs come from, do you know, Mary?’ Mary: ‘No, Miss Mabel, I only laid the table’” was printed in The Whitstable Times and Tankerton Press (Whitstable, Kent, UK) on October 18, 1913. “HEY, MAMIE! WHAT’S THE MATTER WITH THESE EGGS?”/“OH DON’T ASK ME. I ONLY LAID THE TABLE” was in the comic strip Moon Mullins by cartoonist Frank Willard (1893-1958) that was published in newspapers on January 12, 1931.
Newspapers.com
18 October 1913, The Whitstable Times and Tankerton Press (Whitstable, Kent, UK), “Jottings,” pg. 3, col. 6:
Small Girl: “Where did the funny little eggs come from, do you know, Mary?” Mary: “No, Miss Mabel, I only laid the table.”
Newspapers.com
12 January 1931, Bristol (TN) Herald Courier, “Moon Mullins—A Short Order House” comic strip by Frank Willard, pg. 5, col. 2:
12 January 1931, The World-Herald (Omaha, NE), “Moon Mullins—A Short Order House” comic strip by Frank Willard, pg. 10, col. 2:
Man: HEY, MAMIE! WHAT’S THE MATTER WITH THESE EGGS?
Woman: OH DON’T ASK ME. I ONLY LAID THE TABLE.
4 September 1931, Boston (MA) Globe, “Batch of Smiles,” pg. 34, col. 1:
A waiter in a small restaurant was having a trying time with a fractious customer. His patience reached its limit when, coming back from the fifth journey the presence of the man had occasioned him, the customer mumbled” “Waiter! What on earth’s wrong with these eggs?”
“I don’t know, sir,” said the waiter, glancing mildly at the man, then at the offending articles. “I only laid the table.”—London Tit-Bits.
8 October 1931, The Arizona Daily Star (Tucson, AZ), “The Boiling Pot Jokes,” pg. 20, col. 4:
Muggins: Hey, waiter, what’s wrong with these eggs?
Waiter: I don’t know. I only laid the table.
ROSE PETAL ANDY.
Google Books
The Virginia Reel
Volume 13
1936
Pg. 41:
“Waitress, what’s wrong with these eggs?”
“I don’t know, I only laid the table.” —Bored Walk
Chronicling America
29 September 1939, Midland Journal (Rising Sun, MD), pg. 6, col. 4:
Not Her Job
Dinocan—Waitress, these eggs are terrible. What’s wrong with them?
Waitress—I don’t know, sir; I only laid the table.
Google Books
Negro Digest
Volume 3
1944
Pg. 64:
A GROUCHY customer in a Negro restaurant hissed at the waitress: “What’s wrong with these eggs?”
The waitress replied: “Don’t yell at me, mister - I only laid the table!
Sally Wright
Google Groups: rec.humor
Waiter! Waiter!
David Bridges
Apr 22, 1997, 3:00:00 AM
Waiter! Waiter! This egg is rotten!
Don’t blame me, sir, I only laid the table.
Google Books
All-Time Awesome Collection of Good Clean Jokes for Kids
By Bob Phillips
Eugene, OR: Harvest House Publishers
2006
Pg. 359:
Diner: Waiter, these eggs are awful.
Waiter: Don’t blame me. I only laid the table.
Twitter
Frank Hoang
@fhoang7
Joke of the Day:
Customer: Waiter, this egg is bad.
Waiter: Don’t blame me sir, I only laid the table
12:45 AM - 25 Jun 2009
Reddit—Jokes
Posted by u/vivekmaru45 January 24, 2015
Waiter Jokes.
(...)
Customer: Waiter, this egg is bad. Waiter: Don’t blame me, I only laid the table.
Twitter
lorraine Jo King
@LahLahBean
#tuesdaytitters
What’s wrong with these eggs I ordered?
Waiter: Don’t ask me. I only laid the table.
12:25 AM - 5 Jun 2018
Reddit—Dadjokes
Posted by u/VERBERD November 25, 2020
“Waiter, this boiled egg tastes funny”
“Don’t ask me madam. I only laid the table. “
Reddit—3amjokes
Posted by u/EndersGame_Reviewer March 9, 2023
Waiter, waiter, this egg is bad!
Don’t blame me, I only laid the table.