"Beef tongue? I could never eat anything that came…

An old joke has it that a restaurant diner is looking for something to eat, and the waiter (or another diner) suggests tongue. “Oh no, I could never eat anything that came out of an animal’s mouth!” the diner declares. Eggs is then suggested.

The “eating tongue” joke has been cited in print since at least 1914 (when it was called an “old story”) and was popularized on an episode of the 1970s television sitcom All in the Family.

Newspapers.com
17 November 1914, Atchison (KS) Daily Globe, “City Items,” pg. 7, col. 4:
Old story: A man who went into a restaurant was at a loss as to what to eat and the waiter began suggesting things for him. “We have some nice tongue,” said the waiter. “No, I don’t want any tongue,” said the customer, “as years ago I firmly made up my mind that I would never eat anything that came out of an animal’s mouth.” “How about an egg, sir?” then inquired the waiter.

Newspapers.com
22 November 1954, Daily Sikeston Standard (Sikeston, MO), pg. 2, cols. 3-4:
Two very proper ladies scanned the menu. Said one to the other, “How about the smoked tongue?”

“Oh, no!” was the answer, “I couldn’t possibly eat anything that came out of a cow’s mouth.”

“O.K.,” said her friend, “then let’s have scrambled eggs!”

Newspapers.com
11 August 1976, Indianapolis (IN) News, “North to Alaska” by Robert L’Homme, pg. 36, col. 1:
The heavy comedy continues, “You look hungry, how about a piece of my sandwich? Was is it? It’s tongue. Oh, I could never eat anything that came out of a mouth. Then what do you like? Eggs.”

24 February 1986, Pittsburgh (PA) Post-Gazette, Joe Browne column, pg. 14, cols. 5-6:
Choice food
My good pal, Bill Morrissey, now working in New Jersey, sends along this: Tow women, having lunch in a fancy restaurant, were presented a menu by a waiter, who said, “Let me recommend our special, the tongue sandwich. One woman said, “Heavens, no! I’d never eat anything that came out of the mouth of an animal! Just bring me a soft-boiled egg.”

26 April 1993, Sun Sentinel (Fort Lauderdale, FL), “Dick Richards, Burlesque Comedian, pg. 6B:
When he jumped to the Borscht Belt and the Catskills, the jokes became less raunchy: “How about a tongue sandwich? ... I couldn`t eat anything that came out of an animal`s mouth ... OK, how about a couple of eggs?”

Newspapers.com
10 November 1993, Sheboygan (WI) Press, “Joyful Noise” by Joy Daane, pg. A8, col. 4:
I just saw a rerun of “All in the Family” when Edith tried to serve Archie a beef tongue sandwich and he said he wasn’t about to eat anything that came out of a cow’s mouth.

Edith asked, “Well, what DO you want for supper, Archie?”

Archie said, “Eggs.”

29 July 1995, St. Petersburg (FL) Times, “Fun has already begun in Canton” by Hubert Mizell, pg. 1C:
“Wayne Fontes, now Detroit Lions head coach and a 1970s assistant to McKay with the Bucs, told me this one,” Sabol said. “McKay was at dinner in Tampa, there to take a bow for the Bucs. The meal began with a serving of tongue. A woman at John’s table objected, saying how disgusting it was to eat anything that came out of an animal’s mouth. To which the coach said, `Here, madam, try this egg instead.’”

Google Groups: misc.fitness.weights
Cow Tongue
Edward James Kilsdonk
Dec 2, 1998, 3:00:00 AM
(...)
I agree. I would never eat anything that came out of an animals mouth. It’s egg salad for me from now on.

Google Groups: alt.bible
HOW CAN MANY PEOPLE STILL BELIEVE IN GOD?!!!
Michael Painter
Apr 24, 1999, 3:00:00 AM
Cow tongue! Eat something that came out of the mouth of a dumb animal
UGGGGGG.
I’ll have two eggs over easy please.

Google Groups: alt.religion.mormon
SLC Mormons not so bad after all
Copperhead
Sep 1, 2000, 12:56:42 PM
(...)
Speaking of beef tongue, why do people who won’t eat anything that came out of a cow’s mouth eat eggs?

Twitter
RUTH BUZZI
@Ruth_A_Buzzi
Man: What’s the special? Waitress: Calf’s tongue sandwich. Man: I’d never eat anything that came out of a cow’s mouth. Just bring me 2 eggs.
9:24 AM · Sep 6, 2013·Twitter for iPad

Twitter
CarolKirkwoodFanClub
@CarolKfanclub
Friend had a tongue sandwich for lunch.I could never eat something that came out of an animal’s mouth
I had a boiled egg.
8:44 AM · Jan 21, 2015·Twitter for Android

Twitter
Scottie Pippen
@scottynestpas
Waiter: How about this lunch tongue?
Me: Oh no, I couldn’t eat something that came out of an animals mouth. I’ll just have a boiled egg.
3:32 PM · Nov 11, 2015·Twitter for iPad

Twitter
James Rewis
@downindixie
Replying to @pearlylondon and @londonlass666
Diner 1: I’ll have the beef tongue.
Diner 2: How can you eat something that came out of a cow’s mouth?
Diner 1: What are you having?
Diner 2: Eggs.
1:45 PM · Nov 13, 2017·Twitter for iPad

Reddit—Dadjokes
Posted by u/someauthor March 8, 2018
A cow’s tongue? I’m not eating something that came out of an animals mouth…
Gimme two fried eggs.

Twitter
James Rewis
@downindixie
Replying to @Binty_xx
Sam: What are you ordering for lunch?
Dave: A tongue sandwich.
Sam: Ugh! How can you eat something that came out of a cow’s mouth?
Dave: What are you having?
Sam: Eggs.
12:20 PM · Apr 4, 2018·Twitter for iPad

Reddit—Jokes
Posted by u/Vydor May 22, 2018
My niece wouldn’t eat the beef tongue because it came out of the mouth of an animal.
I then prepared her an egg…

Twitter
Michael May
@michaelmay
Cafe advertised Unique Breakfast, man asked waitress what is that, told, Baked chicken tongue
That’s disgusting!, man said. I’d never eat something that came out of a chicken’s mouth
What would you like then?, waitress asked
Oh just bring me some scrambled eggs
10:59 AM · Jan 23, 2019·Buffer

Twitter
James Rewis
@downindixie
Replying to @NorthofSeven and @RCLranger
One of my late Daddy’s favorite jokes: 2 men in a diner.
#1 “What are you having?”
#2 “A tongue sandwich.”
#1 “How can you eat something that came out of a cow’s mouth?”
#2 “Well, then, what are YOU having?”
#1 “Eggs.”
6:59 AM · Feb 5, 2019·Twitter for iPad

Twitter
Jonsta
@Jonsta1990
Woman to the waiter: What on earth is that?
Waiter: It’s pressed tongue, Madam
Woman: Good gracious! I couldn never eat anything that came out of an animal’s mouth. Bring me a boiled egg please
5:08 PM · Dec 6, 2020·Twitter for Android

Twitter
Dennis 2 society
@thedoggydaddy
Replying to @moderndadpages
Old joke:
Two guys are ordering lunch at a diner.
First guy: I’ll have a tongue sandwich
Second guy: That’s gross! How can you eat something that came out of a cow’s mouth? I’ll take two eggs over easy
GIF
7:47 PM · Mar 22, 2021·Twitter for Android

Twitter
Tica Patty
@Ticapatty74
My friend said he would not eat beef tongue because it came out of a cow’s mouth…..so I fixed him an egg.
5:44 PM · Jul 28, 2021·Twitter Web App

Twitter
Caroline Kautsire
@CarolineKautsi1
My friend wouldn’t eat beef tongue because it came out of a cow’s mouth…
So I gave her an egg.🤷🏽‍♀️
4:17 PM · Sep 5, 2021

Twitter
0️⃣BlackBetty ⚓️
@BabyD1111229
Lmao 🤣 I ain’t heard from her in a week 🤣🤣🤣
(The following text is shown on an image.—ed.)
MY FRIEND TOLD ME SHE
WOULDN’T EAT BEEF TONGUE CAUSE
IT CAME OUT OF A COW’S MOUTH
SO I GAVE HER AN EGG
6:56 PM · Nov 17, 2024

“Beef tongue? I could never eat anything that came out of an animal’s mouth. Bring me a boiled egg”