"Alcohol and calculus don't mix -- never drink…

“Alcohol and calculus don’t mix—never drink and derive” is a humorous saying that has been printed on many gift items, such as T-shirts. The “never drink and derive” pun on “never drink and drive” is a very popular joke with mathematicians.

“Don’t Drink and Derive” has been cited in print since at least 1992. “Math and Alcohol don’t mix, so…PLEASE DON’T DRINK AND DERIVE” has been cited since at least 1995. “Alcohol and calculus don’t mix—never drink and derive” has been cited since at least 1998.

Google Groups: rec.windsurfing
Sailing a short board upwind
Marc A. Lefebvre
2/18/92
(...)
“Don’t Drink and Derive”

Humor Text—University of Arizona
SCIENCE JOKES
ver 6.7 mar 1, 1995
Collected by Joachim Verhagen (.(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address))
(...)
Math and Alcohol don’t mix, so…
PLEASE DON’T DRINK AND DERIVE

16 July 1998, Charlotte (NC) Observer, “The Outfront Guy’s Diary,” pg. 4E:
Alcohol and calculus don’t mix. Never drink and derive.

24 March 1999, Augusta (GA) Chronicle, “Scientists use toys to show physics is fun” (Associated Press), pg. 7C, col. 5:
They’ve got lectures on the physics of American staples—baseball and beer—plus show tunes featuring physics-related lyrics and a gift shop hawking alien-shaped lollipops and T-shirts urging people not to drink and derive.

Google News Archive
19 August 2004, Bangor (ME) Daily News, “Bridge: Dirving home a point” by Frank Stewart, pg. D6, col. 5:
If you’re a mathematician, you know that alcohol and calculus don’t mix: Never drink and derive.

Urban Dictionary
Derive
verb
1. To find the point where it came from, to take the derivative
2. To torture (method used by Calculus teachers)
Don’t drink and derive.
by Dragix Nov 12, 2006

Google Books
Gaither’s Dictionary of Scientific Quotations
By Carl C. Gaither and Alma E. Cavazos-Gaither
New York, NY: Springer
2012
Pg. 324:
Alcohol and calculus don’t mix. Never drink and derive.
Source undetermined

Bobbi’s Blog
Alcohol and calculus don’t mix. Never drink and derive.
Posted on April 27, 2012 by bobbiblogger
(Poster art is shown—ed.)