“A naked woman walks into a bar…” (bar joke)
“A guy walks into a bar…” is a typical form of what has been called the “bar joke.” The “naked woman walks into a bar” joke has three versions.
The first version appeared in the movie The Breakfast Club (1985):
“A naked blonde walks into a bar with a poodle under one arm and a two-foot salami under the other. She lays the poodle on the table. Bartender says, ‘I suppose you won’t be needing a drink.’ Naked lady says…”
The joke was cut off in the movie and there is no known punchline.
The other two versions (cited in print in 1999 and in 2015) involve the bartender wondering how the naked lady is going to pay for the drinks.
IMDb (The Internet Movie Database)
FAQ for
The Breakfast Club (1985)
What does Bender’s joke mean?
Bender’s joke begins ““A naked blonde walks into a bar with a poodle under one arm and a two-foot salami under the other. She lays the poodle on the table. Bartender says,‘I suppose you won’t be needing a drink.’ Naked lady says…” He then falls through the air vent and in due to his shock, forgets about telling the joke yelling “Oh shit!” The next lines uttered by him are “Forgot my pencil” by means of an explanation to his confused classmates as to how he got back into the library. The joke was ad-libbed by Judd Nelson and as thus, does not have an actual punchline.
Google Groups: rec.games.pinball
A Pinball Joke
Pete Russell
7/4/99
I haven’t seen this one yet
A naked woman walks into a bar and asks for a drink, the bar tender asks how are you going to pay for this? she hikes her leg up onto the bar stool and points to her crotch, the bartender asks haven’t you got anything smaller?
Google Books
You Are a Dirty Old Man:
A Joke Book
By Banis Skip Cloud
Pittsburgh, PA: Dorrance Publishing Company, Inc.
2012
Pg. 19:
A naked woman walks into a bar and ordered a straight shot with a beer back. The bartender says, “Okay fine, but how are you going to pay for it?” the woman throws a leg upon the bar and nods toward her twat, “Will this do?” she asks. The bartender says, “Sure will, but do you have anything smaller?’
YouTube
The Breakfast Club - Bender falls through the ceiling
Lucia Costamagna
Published on Feb 19, 2013
Twitter
Joon Chung
@thejooniverse
A naked woman walks into a bar. That’s New York baby! #BigEffingDeal
7:42 PM - 18 Mar 2015
reddit
A naked woman walks into a bar… (self.Jokes)
submitted April 17, 2015 by MikeHuntOG
... and asks for a shot of whiskey. Everybody looks perplexed at her, jaws being dropped and all that. The bartender gives her the shot, and looks at her as if he was inspecting. The woman asks for another shot, so the bartender gives her another one, but keeps looking at her. After a while, the woman gets annoyed and asks him:
“Excuse me, but what’s your problem? Haven’t you ever seen a naked woman in your life?”
“I have”- says the bartender -“I’m just trying to figure out how you’re gonna pay for those shots.”
reddit
So a naked woman walks into a bar and asks for a beer… (self.Jokes)
submitted April 17, 2016 by PinkLionThing
The bartender stares at her body from head to toe then serves her a beer. She drinks it and asks for another beer. The bartender stares at her for longer and serves her a second beer. The woman again drinks it and asks for a third beer.
Then the bartender starts to look at her with an amused expression, until the woman says:
—What, have you never seen a naked woman before?
—That I have, miss. I’m wondering where you’re keeping the money to pay for the beers.