A plaque remaining from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem.

Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006.

Recent entries:
“Why did the pirate send his hot dog back at Nathan’s?"/"Because it was a salty dog.” (9/20)
“Sex is like music: for every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free” (9/20)
“Why did the pirate ask to get a mortgage with 3.142 percent interest?"/"He wanted the pi-rate!” (9/20)
Entry forthcoming—B.P. (9/20)
“What is a pirate’s favorite type of music?"/"Arr and B!” (9/20)
More new entries...

A  B  C  D  E  F  G  H  I  J  K  L  M  N  O  P  Q  R  S  T  U  V  W  X  Y  Z


Entry from September 12, 2017
“What do lawyers do after they die?"/"They lie still.”

Lawyers have a reputation for stretching the truth (lying). A popular lawyer joke is:

Q: What do lawyers do after they die?
A: They lie still.


“What do great liars do when they die?—They lie still” was cited in print in 1871 newspapers. “What do lawyers do when they die? Lie still” was printed in an 1878 newspaper.

“How does an attorney sleep?"/"First he lies on one side, then he lies on the other” is sometimes added to the beginning of this lawyer joke. “Lawyers ‘lie first on one side and then on the other,’ and in their graves ‘they lie still’” was printed in 1883.


Chronicling America
29 June 1871, The Elk County Advocate (Ridgway, PA), “Hook and Eyes,” pg. 3, col. 3:
What do great liars do when they die?—They lie still.

11 August 1871, The Daily Post (Pittsburgh, PA), “Varieties,” pg. 3, col. 5:
WHAT do great liars do when they die? They lie still.

16 March 1878, Record of the Times (Wilkes-Barre, PA), “Splinters,"pg. 4, col. 3:
What do lawyers do when they die? Lie still.

Google Books
December 1883, Gibson’s Law Notes, “Attorneys-at-Law” by a Law Book-Worm, pg. 365, col. 1:
We have it on the authority of a well-worn joke, that lawyers “lie first on one side and then on the other,” and in their graves “they lie still.”

29 March 1917, The Post (Cincinnati, OH), pg. 4, col. 2:
THAT fresh, yet not unclever office boy,is again at my elbow.

“Why are lawyers uneasy sleepers?” he asks.

“Why?” I inquire.

“Because they first LIE on one side and then on the other and when they die, they lie still,” he answers.

Well said, Tommy. He’s a nickel for a pack of cigarets.

9 June 1917, Seattle (WA) Daily Times, pg. 9, col. 6:
WHAT DO LAWYERS DO WHEN THEY DIE? THEY LIE STILL.

Google Books
The Joke’s On… Lawyers
By Stan Ross
Sydney, Australia: The Federation Press
1996
Pg. 57:
Q: How can you tell there’s an afterlife for lawyers?
A: Because after they die, they lie still.

20 July 1997, Sunday Age (Melbourne, Australia), “What they’re watching,” pg. 5:
Liar Liar confirms the truth or prejudice of the lawyer joke: what happens when lawyers die - they lie still.

Google Books
Theology and Law: Partners Or Protagonists?
By Gordon Preece
Adelaide, Australia: ATF Press
2005
Pg. 1:
For evidence you only have to look at the abundance of lawyers jokes — such as Q: What happens to lawyers when they die? A: They lie still.

YouTube
Ok, here is the joke. What do lawyers do after they die? They ...
botcaster inc. bot
Published on Jan 22, 2016
What do lawyers do after they die?
They lie still.

Twitter
Lucky Score‏
@LuckyScoreNet
What do lawyers do after they die?
They lie
still.
#Joke from #LawyerJokes in #Jokes, #Humor and #Satire
7:55 PM - 27 Jul 2017

Posted by Barry Popik
New York CityGovernment/Law/Politics/Military • Tuesday, September 12, 2017 • Permalink