A plaque remaining from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem.

Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006.

Recent entries:
“No one looks back on their life and remembers the nights they got plenty of sleep” (7/23)
“Roses are red. Violets are blue. Vodka costs less than dinner for two” (7/23)
“If you don’t like the way I drive, stay off the sidewalk!” (7/23)
“I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally” (7/23)
Entry forthcoming—B.P. (7/23)
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Entry from May 12, 2011
“If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen”

"If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen” is a humorous saying that’s been on bumper stickers since at least 2000. The comedian Bobby Ramsen told this joke to Parade Magazine in October 1962:

I like it when my mother-in-law comes to sleep at our house. That’s the only time I have breakfast in bed. I sleep in the kitchen.”

The “Herman” comic strip by Jim Unger in November 1980 further popularized the joke line, with a character saying, “When I told him it would be nice to have my breakfast in bed once in a while, he told me to sleep in the kitchen.”


26 June 1951, Springfield (MA) Union. “On the Firing Line” by D.N.T., pg. 10, col. 3:
Breakfast in bed is going out of style, says Margaret Weil of INS in a story from New York. She describes furniture especially designed for having breakfast in the bedroom, but personally we’d rather sleep in the kitchen.

7 October 1962, Oregonian (Portland, OR), “My Favorite Jokes” by Bobby Ramsen, Parade Magaine, pg. 27, col. 1:
I like it when my mother-in-law comes to sleep at our house. That’s the only time I have breakfast in bed. I sleep in the kitchen.

25 November 1980, Seattle (WA) Daily Times, “Herman” comic, pg. B6, col. 1:
“When I told him it would be nice to have my breakfast in bed once in a while, he told me to sleep in the kitchen.”

Google News Archive
30 September 1985, Milwaukee (WI) Sentinel, pt. 1, pg. 8, col. 6:
“I said I wanted breakfast in bed. She told me to go sleep in the kitchen.”
-- Prof. Samuel Betances

13 July 2000, Lethbridge (Alberta, Canada) Herald, “Let’s hope the traffic jam was worth the long wait” by Al Beeber, pg. C2, col. 5:
HAVE A LAUGH: From a retired former colleague in Prince Edward Island come the following bumper stickers for women, none of which I’m sure her husband lets her adorn their car with:
(...)
IF YOU WANT BREAKFAST IN BED, SLEEP IN THE KITCHEN.

Google Books
Chocolate for a Woman’s Dreams:
77 Stories to Treasure as You Make Your Wishes Come True

By Kay Allenbaugh
New York, NY: Simon & Schuster
2001
Pg. 105:
If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen.
AUTHOR UNKNOWN

Time magazine
Health: Kirk Douglas, A Lust For Life
By Andrea Sachs Monday, Feb. 18, 2002
(...)
How did your stroke affect your relationship with your wife?

Well, I tell you, my wife was fantastic. The meaning of tough love comes from my wife. [I would say,] “Honey, I would like to have breakfast in bed tomorrow.” [She would reply,] “Breakfast in bed? Sleep in the kitchen.”

OCLC WorldCat record
If you want breakfast in bed, sleep in the kitchen
Author: Dave Meurer
Publisher: Colorado Springs, Colo. : Life Journey, ©2005.
Edition/Format:  Book : English

Posted by Barry Popik
New York CityFood/Drink • (0) Comments • Thursday, May 12, 2011 • Permalink