A plaque remaining from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem.

Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006.

Recent entries:
“Life is basically all the stuff you have to do to get from coffee to wine time” (7/23)
“If people could hear the next five seconds after we hit ‘end call,’ we would have no friends” (7/22)
“In life, the only thing you ever have to do is die. Everything else is a choice” (7/22)
“Instagram is Twitter for people who can’t read” (7/22)
“Math is a drama queen. It can’t seriously have that many problems” (7/22)
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Entry from January 05, 2011
“If dumb were dirt, you would be about an acre”

"If dumb were dirt, you would be about an acre” is said be some to be a Texas expression; Texas certainly has lots of dirt. Variants of the saying include “you would cover about an acre” and various numbers of acres (such as 7 acres, 8 acres, 40 acres).

“If dumb were dirt, you would be about an acre” has been cited in print since at least 1998 and is of unknown authorship.


CafePress
IF DUMB WERE DIRT, YOU WOULD BE ABOUT AN ACRE
Maternity T-Shirt

Google Groups: soc.culture.romanian
Newsgroups: soc.culture.romanian
From: (Mircea)
Date: 1998/05/08
Subject: Re: 250,000 Romanian gypsies deported to Nazi Germany

You are too dumb; if dumb were dirt, you would be about an acre.

Google Groups: pdx.singles
Newsgroups: pdx.singles
From: (HDE)
Date: 1998/07/12
Subject: Re: What’s with this?

if dumb were dirt she’d cover Texas.....maybe even Oklahama....but don’t pollute my hometown with the dregs of that wastoid.

26 July 1998, The Press of Atlantic City (NJ), “Voice of the People”:
If dumb were dirt the Mullica GOP could cover the entire township.

AWS
A Winning Strategy:  Wordplay
Jo March & Ryo Sen
01.25.01
(...)
“In fact, we’ve got an expression down here in Texas for guys like him: If dumb were dirt, he’d be an acre.’”

TalkLeft: The Politics of Crime
Maher Arar and John Brennan
By Big Tent Democrat, Section Media
Posted on Mon Dec 08, 2008 at 08:14:39 AM EST
(...)
COMMENTS
What you fail to realize:
by Dark Avenger on Tue Dec 09, 2008 at 09:35:45 AM EST
As my Texas granddaddy would’ve told you, if dumb were dirt, you’d cover about 7 acres.

Google Books
Butter My Butt and Call Me a Biscuit:
And Other Country Sayings, Say-Sos, Hoots and Hollers

By Allan Zullo and Gene Cheek
Kansas City, MO: Andrews McMeel Pub.
2009
Pg. 117:
Stupid
If dumb were dirt, you’d be ‘bout an acre.

Oliver Willis
Palin Favorables/Unfavorables A Bucket Of Fail
1:14 am EST December 30th, 2010
(...)
COMMENTS
The Dark Avenger says:
January 1, 2011 at 3:21 pm
As they say in Texas, “If dumb were dirt, that would cover about seven acres.”

Posted by Barry Popik
Texas (Lone Star State Dictionary) • (0) Comments • Wednesday, January 05, 2011 • Permalink