A plaque remaining from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem.

Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006.

Recent entries:
“Yo mama is so fat, when she went skydiving she caused an eclipse” (8/20)
“Yo mama is so fat, when she went skydiving she caused an eclipse” (8/20)
Entry forthcoming—B.P. (8/20)
“Solar energy is just nuclear energy from a safe distance” (8/20)
“With Google Earth, people can see any place on the globe. But we just look up our homes” (8/20)
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Entry from February 05, 2017
“I cleaned the attic with my wife. Now I can’t get the cobwebs out of her hair”

There are two jokes about “cleaning the attic with my/the wife.” The first version was posted to the newsgroup alt.quotations on November 26, 1993 and has been credited to British comedian Tommy Cooper (1921-1984):

“I went up into the attic with the wife the other day. Dirty, filthy, covered in cobwebs. But she’s good with the kids.”

A second version became popular in 2010 and was posted on Twitter on January 21, 2010:

“I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day. Now I can’t get the cobwebs out of her hair.”

“A man is washing the car with his son. The son asks, ‘Dad, can’t you just use a sponge?‘“ is a similar joke.


Google Groups: alt.quotations
Suicide Quotes
Simon Mark Trew
11/26/93
(...)
I went up into the attic with the wife the other day. Dirty, filthy, covered in cobwebs. But she’s good with the kids

Google Groups: alt.sports.college.ohio-state
T-Shirts: One FOSML Shirt Left!
Tom Green
5/4/97
(...)
I went up into the attic with the wife the other day. Dirty, filthy, covered in cobwebs ... but she’s good with the kids.

Google Groups: rec.models.railroad
For Big John - an eBay item you’ll love
TOM
1/29/00
(...)
“Went up to the attic with my wife, dusty and covered with cobwebs, but she’s good with the kids.”

Google Groups: alt.music.zevon
new concert at jaxer
david
7/19/03
(...)
The thumbnail pictures you can see are the front and back sleeves for the WOL single as released in the UK in the 70’s (my first WZ purchase). I found it while cleaning the attic with my wife. Filthy, dirty and covered in cobwebs but she’s good to the kidsgrin

Twitter
Steven Winterburn
‏@5tevenw
I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day. Now I can’t get the cobwebs out of her hair.
3:15 PM - 21 Jan 2010

Twitter
Jacob Mason
‏@JacobMason
I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.
Now I can’t get the cobwebs out of her hair.
8:25 AM - 28 Jan 2010

Twitter
Mike Perry
‏@67notout
A Tommy Cooper joke: I’ve been cleaning out the attic with my wife and now I can’t get the cobwebs out of her hair.
11:58 AM - 3 Jul 2010

Google Groups: rec.boats
OT: Top 50 Jokes of All Time
Wayne.B
10/26/10
TOP 50 JOKES OF ALL TIME (with an English twist)
(...)
26.  I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day. Now I can’t get the cobwebs out of her hair.

Twitter
Dante Montagnani
‏@Dantechianti
Today cleaned the attic with my wife, now she’s got all dust and cobwebs in her hair can’t get it out
3:04 PM - 22 Oct 2010

Google Books
The Mammoth Book of One-Liners
Edited by Geoff Tibballs
London: Constable & Robinson Ltd
2012
Pg. ?:
I cleaned the attic with my wife last week. Now I can’t get the cobwebs out of her hair.

Google Books
101 Best Jokes Ever
By various authors
Editions ASAP
2013
Pg. ?:
“Would you believe I cleaned the attic with my wife last weekend? I still can’t get the dust out of her hair.”

Google Books
5,000 Sidesplitting Jokes and One-Liners
Compiled by Grant Tucker
New York, NY: Skyhorse Publishing
2013
Pg. 159:
I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day. Now I can’t get the cobwebs out of her hair.

Google Books
I Knew You Were Trouble:
A Jessie Jefferson Novel

By Paige Toon
New York, NY: Simon & Schuster
2015
Pg. ?:
‘I cleaned the attic with my wife the other day,’ Samuel says suddenly. I look at him with interest. I didn’t think he was married. ‘Now I can’t get the cobwebs out of her hair,’ he continues.

I stare at him with confusion for a moment before bursting into laughter.

Posted by Barry Popik
New York CityBuildings/Housing/Parks • Sunday, February 05, 2017 • Permalink