“How does Good King Wenceslas like his pizzas?”/“One that’s deep pan, crisp and even.”
“Good King Wenceslas” is a Chistmas carol that begins:
“Good King Wenceslas looked out
On the feast of Stephen
When the snow lay round about
Deep and crisp and even.”
“Deep and” became a joke about “deep pan” pizza. “By the way, what’s the best pizza to have at Christmas? (...) Deep pan, crisp and even” was posted to the newsgroup comp.sys.amstrad.8bit on December 7, 1997.
The pizza joke went viral in December 2000. This was posted to the newsgroup alt.tasteless.jokes on December 11, 2000:
“Good King Wenceslas rings up his local Italian restaurant to order a pizza. ‘Certainly, your majesty,’ says the manager. ‘Will it be your usual? Deep pan, crisp and even?’”
In 2007, this was voted the worst Christmas cracker joke ever.
Wikipedia: Good King Wenceslas
“Good King Wenceslas” is a popular Christmas carol that tells a story of a Bohemian king going on a journey and braving harsh winter weather to give alms to a poor peasant on the Feast of Stephen (December 26, the day after Christmas). During the journey, his page is about to give up the struggle against the cold weather, but is enabled to continue by following the king’s footprints, step for step, through the deep snow. The legend is based on the life of the historical Saint Wenceslaus I, Duke of Bohemia or Svatý Václav in Czech (907–935). The name Wenceslas is a Latinised version of the modern Czech language “Václav”.
Christmas Carols (carols.org.uk)
Good King Wenceslas
The words to the carol “Good King Wenceslas” were written by John Mason Neale and published in 1853, the music originates in Finland 300 years earlier. This Christmas carol is unusual as there is no reference in the lyrics to the nativity. Good King Wenceslas was the king of Bohemia in the 10th century.
Good King Wenceslas was a Catholic and was martyred following his assassination by his brother Boleslaw and his supporters, his Saint’s Day is September 28th, and he is the Patron Saint of the Czech Republic. St. Stephen’s feast day was celebrated on 26th December which is why this song is sung as a Christmas carol.
Good King Wenceslas : Lyrics
Good King Wenceslas looked out
On the feast of Stephen
When the snow lay round about
Deep and crisp and even
Brightly shone the moon that night
Though the frost was cruel
When a poor man came in sight
Gath’ring winter fuel
Google Groups: comp.sys.amstrad.8bit
Ram Music Machine
Brian Watson
12/7/97
(...)
By the way, what’s the best pizza to have at Christmas?
(Scroll down for the answer)
Deep pan, crisp and even.
Google Groups: alt.tasteless.jokes
Joke of the Day (Monday)
Seals
12/11/00
(...)
Good King Wenceslas rings up his local Italian restaurant to order a pizza. “Certainly, your majesty,” says the manager. “Will it be your usual? Deep pan, crisp and even?”
12 December 2000, The Herald (Glasgow, Scotland), “Diary” by Tom Shields, pg. 14:
And we’re still not sure if Colin McCaffery of Peterhead, deserves a prize for his attempt at seasonal humour with Good King Wenceslas phoning his local Pizza Hut to place an order. “Will you have your usual?” says the girl on the phone.
“Yes,” says GKW, “Deep pan, crisp and even.”
12 December 2000, The Scotsman (Edinburgh, Scotland), “The Scotsman Diary: The Archers” by Pia Simon, pg. 14:
Aye, Christmas is indeed coming. Good King Wenceslas was in the queue when we dropped in for a pizza the other night. What sort did he want?
“Deep pan, crisp and even.”
Google Groups: rec.pets.cats.anecdotes
58 new babies!!
Wafflycat
12/22/00
(...)
p.s. Good King Wenceslas is hungry, so he phones his local pizza delivery place. Guy at the end of the phone says, “Okay, King, how do you want your pizza?” Good King W replies, “Oh, same as usual, deep pan, crisp and even.”
Google Books
Christmas:
Decorations, Feasts, Gifts, Traditions
By David Baird
London: MQP
2005
Pg. 302:
How did Good King Wenceslas like his pizzas?
Deep pan, crisp and even!
Google Books
I Hate Christmas:
A Manifesto for the Modern-day Scrooge
By Daniel Blythe
London: Allison & Busby
2005
Pg. 103:
You really are intent upon declaring that you are not ‘doing’ it this year, and make a point of ordering a ‘Good King Wenceslas’ from your local Italian. (That’s ‘deep pan, crisp and even’, by the way.)
Twitter
John Naruwan
@Naruwan
When Good King Wenceslas went to Pizza Hut, what sort of pizza did he order? Deep pan crisp and even [ba-dum]
7:47 AM - 16 Dec 2007
The Telegraph (UK)
Top ten worst Christmas cracker jokes ever
By Natalie Paris 2:01PM GMT 19 Dec 2007
Hold onto your party crown and steady your port glass as we reveal the worst Christmas cracker jokes of all time.
A survey by Nuts magazine has produced a top ten most groan-inducing festive gags, with a witticism about Santa’s choice of pizza securing the top spot.
The joke asks: What is Santa’s favourite pizza?
Answer: One that’s deep pan, crisp and even.
Andrew Linn, Professor of Linguistics at the University of Sheffield, deconstructed the joke.
“The essence of a fine joke is clever and original use of language, often exploiting some sort of ambiguity.
“This joke has been voted the worst Christmas cracker joke because it is almost too clever,” Prof Linn said.
“It uses ambiguity in how the words are put together (‘deep pan’ = ‘deep and’) as well as contextual ambiguity (pizzas and a Christmas carol).
Twitter
David Rosam
@davidrosam
What is Santa’s favourite pizza? One that’s deep pan, crisp and even!
2:42 AM - 21 Dec 2007
Google Books
Gigglers: Christmas Jokes
By Toby Reynolds
London: Scholastic Fiction
2015
Pg. 36:
Q. How does Good King Wenceslas like his pizzas?
A. Deep pan, crisp and even!
The Telegraph (UK)
50 best Christmas cracker jokes
Jon Stock
1 DECEMBER 2016 • 9:30AM
(...)
How does Good King Wenceslas like his pizzas?
One that’s deep pan, crisp and even!