"Hire a teenager while they still know everything” is a popular sign. Ann Landers gave advice in July 1967, “Confidential to Sick of Bossy Parents: So why don’t you get out on your own and see how it is—while you still know everything?” This joke appeared on the front page of an Oklahoma newspaper in February 1969: “The Sooner Cynic suggests that some of our teenagers maybe should start shifting for themselves now why they still know everything.”
“Hire a teenager...while he still knows everything” was “today’s chuckle” in a newspaper on December 16, 1984. “Hire a Teenager Today—While He Still Knows Everything!” was put on a bumper sticker by at least 1985.
25 July 1967, Titusville (PA) Herald, Ann Landers syndicated advice column, pg. 8, col. 2:
Confidential to Sick of Bossy Parents: So why don’t you get out on your own and see how it is—while you still know everything?
11 February 1969, Ada (OK) Evening News, pg. 1 (above mast):
The Sooner Cynic suggests that some of our teenagers maybe should start shifting for themselves now why they still know everything.
27 July 1979, Aiken (SC) Standard, pg. 1, col. 1:
Have You Heard...that Rotary newscaster and wit Randy Davidson told a story of a father speaking to his son? “Maybe you should start shifting for yourself now while you still know everything,” the man said.
16 December 1984, The Sunday Republican (Springfield, MA), “Today’s chuckle,” pg. 2, col. 4:
Hire a teenager...while he still knows everything.
The Gift of Love
By Vladimir Berzonsky
Crestwood, NY: St. Vladimir’s Seminary Press
A charming bumper sticker reflects that truth: “Hire a Teenager Today—While He Still Knows Everything!”
Humor and Society:
Explorations in the Sociology of Humor
By Marvin R. Koller
Houston, TX: Cap and Gown Press
One entrepreneur has capitalized on this theme by offering a sign which humorously advises, “Hire teenagers while they still know everything!”
4 December 1992, Orlando (FL) Sentinel, “110 years have been hard but also blessed” by Allen Rose, pg. B1:
Bumper sticker report from a reader: “Hire teenagers now, while they still know everything.”
18 February 1993, Rocky Mountain News (Denver, CO), “Magic scored where mom failed in warning kids about deadly foe” by Trisha Flynn:
It reminds me of a bumper-sticker I once had: Hire Teen-agers Now, While They Still Know Everything.
Erie (PA) Times-News
Lifestyle by Lenore Skomal
Published: January 12, 2012 12:01 AM EST
Updated: January 11, 2012 4:15 PM EST
The guy at the dry cleaners has a sign hanging over his counter: Hire teenagers while they still know everything.