A plaque remaining from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem.

Above, a 1934 plaque from the Big Apple Night Club at West 135th Street and Seventh Avenue in Harlem. Discarded as trash in 2006.

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Entry from May 23, 2017
“A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing”

"A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing” is a jocular one-line saying about chess that has been printed on many images. Philips told the joke in Emo Philips - Comedian and Mammal 1990. “A quick one from Emo (...) My computer beat me at chess.  But it’s no match for me at kickboxing” was posted on the newsgroup rec.humor on November 23, 1993.

The joke was told before chessboxing combined the two and became popular in the 2000s.

“I like to play chess with old men in the park…although it’s hard to find 32 of them” is another Emo Philips chess joke.


Wikipedia: Emo Philips
Emo Philips (born Phil Soltanek; February 7, 1956) is an American comedian. Much of his stand-up comedy makes use of paraprosdokians spoken in a wandering falsetto tone of voice. The confused, childlike delivery of his material produces the intended comic timing in a manner invoking the ‘wisdom of children’ or the idiot savant.

Google Groups: rec.humor
A quick one from Emo
Fil Feit
11/23/93
My computer beat me at chess.  But it’s no match for me at kickboxing.

Google Groups: comp.sys.mac.comm
Globalvillage 800 Number
OS
12/17/93
(...)
My computer beat me at chess. But it’s no match for me in kickboxing,

Google Groups: alt.tasteless.jokes
Michael Jackson
A.J.Henderson, Computer Centre
12/21/93
(...)
My computer can beat me at chess… but I can kick its butt at kickboxing

Google Groups: alt.pub.coffeehouse.amethyst
The quote bored into my mind…
Nathan Don Walton
1/11/94
(...)
My computer beat me at chess.  But it’s no match for me at kickboxing.

Google Groups: comp.sys.mac.hardware
Difference btw PPC Chips??
Richard P. Muller
2/28/95
(...)
My computer beat me at chess, but it’s no match for me at kickboxing.

Slap-drones - Culture murders.

Google Groups: alt.books.iain-banks
Simon J Grimshaw
3/30/99
(...)
Off topic, but as Emo Phillips said “My computer beat me at chess; but it was no match for me at kick-boxing...”

GOogle Books
Essential Chess Quotations
Edited by John C. Knudsen
Lincoln, NE: iUniverse.com, Inc.
2000
Pg. ?:
If you can’t beat your computer at chess, try kickboXing. - Anon

Google Groups: alt.humor
My computer beat me at chess.
Craig Bennett
8/30/01
My computer beat me at chess.
But it’s no match for me at kickboxing. 

Google Books
Penguin Pocket Jokes
By David Pickering
London, UK: Penguin Books
2006
Pg. ?:
‘A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing.’ (Emo Philips)

Google Books
Tweet This Book:
The 1,400 Greatest Quotes of All Time in 140 Characters Or Less

Compiled and edited by Sayre Van Young and Marin Van Young
Berkeley, CA: Ulysses Press
2011
Pg. 52:
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.
Emo Philips

Chess.com
Stand-Up Chess: Emo Philips
DaveOakRidges
Mar 1, 2012, 8:20 PM
One of the more unusual American stand-up comedians, Emo has contributed the following to chess humour;

1. Computer Chess:
“A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.” (attributed to Emo Philips)

Google Books
Biteback Dictionary of Humorous Sporting Quotations
By Fred Metcalf
London, UK: Biteback Publishing Ltd
2013
Pg. ?:
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.
Emo Philips, comedian

Google Books
Readers Digest Funny Family Jokes:
Something for Everyone from Age 9 to 99

By Editors at Reader’s Digest
White Plains, NY: The Reader’s Digest Association
2014
Pg. ?:
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.
EMO PHILIPS

YouTube
Emo Philips - Comedian and Mammal 1990
More Chips
Published on Nov 8, 2015
31:00
“I was at a computer shop and this little computer beats me at chess. Ah, but it was no match for me at kick boxing!”

Posted by Barry Popik
New York CitySports/Games • Tuesday, May 23, 2017 • Permalink